some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
where are my eyebrows?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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