I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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