we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
