You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
