I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
