What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
