Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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