batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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