You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
