There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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