No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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