you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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