Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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