you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
