my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
