it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
At least make sure they are 18
Why
420 ftw
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
