If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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