yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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