So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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