we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize