I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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