Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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