he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
