somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize
