SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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