She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
