I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
When did we convert life to cartoon?
COCAINE IS GR8
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
