is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
