If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Is it penis luge time yet?
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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