you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
