i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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