I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
