this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
