Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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