so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
