brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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