It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
