She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
