matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
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