listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Randomize