dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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