I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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