Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
