I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
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