Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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