Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
