Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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