I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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