First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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