You don't have asthma, your pregnant
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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